I can't stop feeling guilty. :'(

I am so sorry.

Can I just end my life? I want to die and just end everything. No more nagging from you. Why am I always the one who get the scolding while she sleeps her time away? Why am I always the one who end up doing the accounts while she enjoys her time with her friends, be a couch potato? She used my cup and just leave it in the living room; the very last spot where she finished the last sip of her drink? What meaningless life I am leading. Please god, let me die asap. Please end my sufferings. I had enough! Enough is really enough! Even if I have the nicest boyfriend on earth, I am willing put everything down. Please...

Sleepless nights since Monday. I hate this. Eversince her arrival, I have not been sleeping well. Cramped and small area remaining for me to sleep. I am no longer a 3 year old who can squeeze into that space. How long do I have to endure?

This is not the time to question about my filial piety to you!

I hate you for shrinking your duty as a son. I look down on you!

Exams are finally over. Again, I foresee another round of disappointment upon receiving my results. I am crossing my fingers and pray hard that I can score at least 50marks in order to proceed to other papers. I dread studying, especially preparing for this professional examination.

Planned a list of post exams activities to be completed before I fly to KCH with dear dear. Completed most of my To-Do List. Next few days will be occupied with meet-ups! I miss those people whom I am going to meet. So many things to catch up with them. The next few days will be very eventful. Haha...

I am going to apply for a new job. Wish me all the best to be employed by that particular company. =)

12 more days to go!

Seriously in need to catch a breather. Dying of exhaustion soon. This company does not offer a single study leave or exam leave. Stressed to the max with only 4 days of leave. I can feel the tension on my brain, shoulders and neck. Actually, every single part of me is break down anytime.

Stressed! Stressed! Stressed! I AM DESPERATE FOR A DE-STRESSING SESSION!

I may start hunting for jobs after my exams. No morale to work. Furthermore, the thought of my employment contract makes me super sian. Which sector should I join? I will have to make a decision after my exams. I guess it would either be tax or audit. Going to give other sectors a chance instead of coping myself with only payments, accruals and etc. I should venture other sectors since I am still considered young. Haha...

Fatigue, lethargy, restless, listless, exhaustion got over me this week. I am so worn out. The devil within me always claims victory thus leading to no revisions done for the whole of this week.

I can't help sinking into self-sympathy. Recurring questions keep appearing in my weary brain. Even mummy finds me nag like an old lady. But I simply can't stop doing that! I must pull myself out of this monthly shit and get down to what I am supposed to do.

I finally got my hands on the classy wallet I placed my eyes on! Ta da!!! Retail therapy does help to soothe my stress level. :]

Why is 93.3 playing all the sad songs? It made me cry even harder. Crying myself to sleep.